A cold open for The Office season two.
FADE IN
INT. OFFICE – ACCOUNTING AREA
MICHAEL holds a tray of brownies and is persistently trying to get OSCAR to eat one.
MICHAEL
Come on you have to try one! I was up all night making them. Come on come on come on….
OSCAR continues to push MICHAEL away while he pushes a brownie towards his mouth.
OSCAR
No Michael I will not eat or do anything that you say today. Get away from me!
MICHAEL continues to persist aggressively while ANGELA, KEVIN, and others can be heard in the background telling him to stop.
JIM TALKING HEAD
JIM
Michael has declared today “Extreme prank day”. And we’re all afraid.
INT. OFFICE – ACCOUNTING AREA
MICHAEL is getting upset
MICHAEL
Guys come on, would I put something in the brownies? That would be too easy. Do you really think that little of my pranking skills?
Phillis
Well if there’s nothing wrong with them why don’t you eat one?
MICHAEL
Maybe I will!
Michael picks up a brownie and looks deeply at it, hesitating to eat.
MICHAEL
You know what? I made these for you people. Will you show a little consideration? It would be selfish of me and I’m not selfish. I’m the least selfish man on earth.
Dwight runs over from his desk
DWIGHT
I will eat them Michael. I respect you and your unselfish ways.
Dwight eats the brownies while the entire office silently watches him. Michael tries to hold back laughter.
DWIGHT
Yes I know the brownies were poisoned. Why else would he be giving them to the accounting department? Overstaffed. Luckily I’ve built up an immunity to all common poisons by slowly giving myself larger and larger doses. Michael wouldn’t have access to high end poisons.
MICHAEL TALKING HEAD
Michael is crying laughing
MICHAEL
He’s going to poop so much.
OPENING CREDITS